I will be honest. At times it is difficult to share about my child’s behavior. Although I have written about it in the past, it remains a struggle for me. There is a feeling of sadness that fills me when I talk about it. Being honest with others and sharing, that although Nate resides in a residential facility full-time, we continue to have major issues with his behavior.
There have been numerous appointments with Nate’s psychiatrist to discuss this problem and we have requested an increase in his medicine to help him. We have also called in a Behavioral Specialist to give us a plan to help him. From these meetings, reports have been written, giving us detailed strategies, on how to help Nate change this unwanted behavior. However, it seems as if those suggestions are only that, just suggestions, as Nate continues to be combative.
At our last meeting, two weeks ago, I left with a heaviness and sadness. When I went home…..
I was angry…..
I felt lost…..
I doubted if Nate should be at the facility…..
I questioned if he should come home…..
I told myself that I was wrong for sending him away….
I prayed, and then I got up…..
I didn’t want to pray anymore….
I had a bad attitude with God…
Then I felt bad for, having a bad attitude with God….
Then I prayed again….
This time……I gave it to God……
I surrendered Nate…
I handed Nate and all of his behavior problems to God…..
“I can’t do it anymore”, I told God…
You have to…..