Giving Grace to My Son With Behavior Difficulties
A few months ago, Nate was home from his residential facility. We went swimming and then came home to relax. Nate seemed to enjoy the rest, as he laid down and I sat next to him reading my book.
As the day moved on, Nate became annoyed and irritated, so I rubbed his back to make him feel better. He moved my hand as he didn’t want me to bother him, but I continued to rub his back to make him feel better. Obviously, I did not understand that he didn’t want me to touch him, because he reached up and grabbed my hair. He pulled it so hard, that my hair came out from my scalp. It was painful. Although the incident happened rather quickly, I could hear the light sound of my hair tearing away from my head. I immediately got up and walked to the bathroom where I looked in the mirror to my horror.
I took deep breaths as I noticed my long loc detached from my scalp. The sight of it, made it even more painful. I stood there for a few minutes looking at the patch of missing hair on my head. I studied it, as I wondered how I was going to hide it from myself and from others who would ask me questions.
For a while, I continued to look at my hair, positioning it in different styles, trying to obscure the small bald spot. After a while, I realized I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t even cry as I began to think about Nate.
“Nate doesn’t understand.”
“Nate doesn’t know any better.”
So, I returned to sitting next to my son. I picked up my book. This time I left him alone.
I forgave him.
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